Democrats & Liberals Archives

Rove Endorses Kucinich (Satire)

Claiming that he “wants to have a good fight” Republican strategist Karl Rove officially endorsed Dennis Kucinich for the Democratic nomination. Although he acknowledges that Kucinich has his detractors, Rove said that he has important strengths that Democrats have failed to appreciate, “Anyone who can run a city the size of Cleveland is going to be a tough competitor. Dennis showed real guts by bankrupting the city instead of kowtowing to those creditors. And then there’s his nickname: The Menace. That is someone you don’t want to mess around with.”

The Republican strategist professed admiration for Kucinich’s plan to reduce defense spending and use the money to pay for universal pre-kindergarten. “A lot of liberals have the idea that small children should just run around and play all day. Dennis recognizes that they need to hit the books.” This is part of what he calls Kucinich’s “no-nonsense” approach. “Most politicians try to sugarcoat their message. Dennis gives it to you straight.” At the same time, Rove sees Kucinich as someone who shows grace in difficult situations. “Your average politician would have difficulty completely changing his position on abortion shortly before running for President. He survived that, sort of.” Rove also noted that Kucinich resembles Frodo, a beloved character from the popular Lord of the Rings trilogy.

Posted by Woody Mena at January 24, 2004 9:57 AM